Ourselves, As We Were

you are my brittle awkward fears
everything now is salty stale crackers
and the feeling fingers, a calloused fade

the world is my tinnitus background blur
one for Lauryn and it's always three a.m.
choking on the acrid plastic flower fire
I'm always midnight in the bathing rain

where are you in this world of two way mirrors
the silent echoes of your horrid disdain
those miles are long from my line of sight
that nothing's never what it should have been

your fix isn't in tearing things apart
your heart was filled with those paper scraps
and there's so much truth in your glossolalia
but you'll come back from the runaway ramble

the clock strikes hard when you least expect it
shielded by some insipid insecurity
broken paperback whispers on a forgotten shelf
shattered shadows that bleed like old ink

his keys fall all at once with smashing thunder
this typewriter typewritten transcript of tears
I can't always remember the misspoken words
never never never in this hundred years

you're pink canvas and I'm falling apart corduroy